R.K.D.

19 years old

Chardon, OH

Male

About

As a preface to part of this story called my life and thoughts, from infant to middle school I had been going to Sunday school and that fun stuff. Really it was fun. I had also been in a program with mentally stunted children before entering public schooling. What that says about me is your call. Or better yet you can ask me about it.

A frosty winter night... the moon is full... the land barren...deathly silent....

This stroll may be my last. I had gone too far this time. The warm vapors steadily release from his cold body. Every mile that lay before him stretches further at every breath. It seems to go on for eternity. In and out, push and pull to the beating drum. Left foot, right foot, left foot, right foot, seems to be harmonizing this ubiquitous pattern of life. As the wind begins to pick up the silence is shattered with a numbing roar. At this point he prefers the sound of his life to that of the Earth. Mother nature is cold. His thoughts start to drift as the cold needles pierce his fragile existence. His arm starts to fade, he feels this as he takes a drag of his smoke. It brings him warmth but not enough to sustain. So he thinks," This is temporary, such is life."

Perfect silence is what awaits us in my opinion. And then a self.
If it can be done once who's to say it can not be done again.
If another says differently, who cares. That goes for what I say as well although I'm trying figure this out in a way that makes sense (Not in the fake way of saying that I completely believe what some VERY old dudes believed back in the time of no running water, WTF is electricity, why are those dots glowing in the sky, and what is up with that warm round ball that burns my eyes.) The reason people involve God, in my opinion, is to kiss all the way up to heaven (which is vaguely up somewhere but thats where every soul supposedly wants to go.) Not a bad thing, just doesn't seem selfless. Then again the selfish are rewarded with stuff. Like most kings had/have a castle because God says so and most people are sheep and are herded by these shepherds to do as they say. And then of course when he doesn't have enough stuff or someone just pisses him off enough he goes to war.... er wait he sends his sheep to fight his war. And they thank him for it if it goes well because in turn they get more stuff, not as much as him, but still... more stuff.

Hmmmmm... ? When I leave this world I will leave nothing unsaid and nothing undone. I can't live with regret. There are very few that aren't worthwhile to spend time with in my eyes. I believe every person is beautiful, because they share this moment on earth with me until I or another, depart from here. This is the waiting room, a countdown until my death. Everything that I done will been done, no redo. Take all the opportunities you can or it will be a could have been instead of what was. All will become clear to me, hopefully, after my body lets go of this life's influence. I am content with the life I have. There's a bunch of fun shit to do all the time. Live it up, smoke it down. Don't fuck it up too bad and life will be great. Don't really understand how I got here or why but what is, is. I like Marijuana and supporting it; don't care if illegal now because the only way for it to become legal is people's support. Prohibition didn't become overturned by non-alcoholics just like legalization will need the support of stoners and more. Donations, talk, awareness, and getting involved are great ways to improve its reputation of this destroyer of societies that causes insane murders or so says many anti-marijuana spokespeople. It's safer than alcohol in my opinion and better than cigarettes. Non-addictive in a physical sense, tastes better, and no overdose risks at all in any practical sense. The high is better than a drunk. More control over your body and relaxed. Drinking isn't too bad unless you like driving. I have gotten drunk before and its fun but sometimes stupid shit happens. Still fun just rather have a pow wow circle hitting a bong. __________________________________________________________
Life changes to a different shade of gray every day, The path in life you choose is what you lose, After its what you say is done going on your way, Dreams of reds, yellows, and blues while you snooze, Will never be as vivid as the double entendre of life's boos.
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I am a product of my environment given free will. These words are my own yet not my own. The words precede my being as I know it today. I have been before me yet now is all I know. My being consists of a string of sequential events, emotions, lessons, and my own adaptations. I am not religious; we live in a time with explanations more sound than that of a story. I am in pursuit of absolute truth in being. Yet my ideas of god is the being or lack of - that set in motion everything. What that is I'm unsure of but wouldn't there be a telltale signature? We wouldn't know because we are unable to distinguish this life to that of any other. The bible is an astrotheological literary hybrid. It's definitely a piece of mans work. Whether or not there was divine knowledge bestowed I'm not sure because for at the time the knowledge of astrology was very accurate but thats like saying that any new innovation of man is divine inspiration. Men and women of all walks of life are able to contribute to our global society. It's not the clearcut good vs bad cause of the many factors. Really I don't know, jus makin some observations and educated statements. Any insights on any subject would be appreciated. I have only my one life's reference that has been worth its weight in blood of my ancestors. I don't wish to offend their ideas, maybe I don't understand the message from the past completely. Who knows the truth? What exactly is this truth that the human species is making steps and strides to find? I think it's up to the individual, his/her particular goals in life, emotions, ability to convey those emotions. The human algorithm is a bit more complex because we are aware on a level beyond animals as far as we know. Turning the elements of earth and universe into the houses, electronics, and even instruments to amplify our intelligence, production, ect. is knowing quite a bit. I could go on and on about that... blah blah blah.