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Members: 32
Comments: 420
Shoutbox - 111 comments
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rhino says:
so the ladies like the stories huh.... Well I could think of three things I'd like to do. One would involve some ice cubes and a nine iron. Two would involve a buffalo, live or stuffed, preferably stuffed for safety sake, and three, we bring back some of those ice cubes and switch it over to a pitching wedge.
posted Dec 3
Comment replies (5)
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Mr. Helms says:
"so the ladies like the stories huh"... No way!! Girls like the thought of twins as well! (actually, I'm in no position to tell anyone what women do or don't want, and God knows that if they wanted the same thing that I want them to want, that I would never leave my bed)
posted Dec 4
Mr. Helms says:
SWEET!!! This is the group that I've been searching for since my internet conception half a decade ago.
Don't judge me... They're legal now!!
The illusion starts as I arrive home from work in a zoned out daze, and notice my new babysitters (pictured above) completely neglecting their duties as child keepers (I don't really have kids). In an angry, slobbery scream, I vocalize at the top of my lungs, "BITCH!!! PUT MY ICE CREAM DOWN!!". Babysitter 1, the one I yelled at, proceeds to drop to her knees while licking the sugar substance from her fingers, and she states in an almost whisper, "Ohhhh.... Mr. Helms.... What ever can I do to be forgiven for my dirty, dirty, crimes??". I promptly respond with, "Look slut, it's going to take more than you're anorexic, over-priced ass to work forgiveness out of me!". It's about this point that babysitter two joins the first, an they proceed to strip each other of their sin-filled clothes.
About that time, my childrens' mother (pictured below) makes it home from work.
As my wife enters the room, she notices the mini-boob bearing beings excited and anxiously awaiting their turn at what my wife reffers to as, "The Love Stick of Very Pleasurable Death and Destruction". Ohhhhh.... She's not happy at the site of this... her response to the actions of the twins is what some might consider to be an overreaction... My wife immediately, as she drops her drawers states excitedly that, "I get the twins first, focker!!! After the oral pleasures I brought to you last night, it's the least you can do!!". I try to explain to her that there are two of them, but she simply won't share. I continue to plea my case as Mrs...
And, sorry guys, but I'm out of letters... (only get 2000)... Let me know if it's too much / too little/or just too fucked up for here.
posted Nov 27
Comment replies (17)
Mr. Helms says:
Yeah... but the group description made it seem as though it would be alright... I'd have trouble expressing my fantasies without a story, or a severely doctored photo.
posted Nov 27
moo says:
'boring' as in uninteresting, rather than my group of the same name, I hope...!
posted Nov 27
Mr. Helms says:
lol... That's the censored softcore story... It gets worse from there... At least until someone say that I'm freaking them out, and asks me to stop...
posted Nov 29
WoozyChain says:
i think rhona mitra is by far the most beautiful woman on tv right now.
posted 3 days ago
Comment replies (1)
moo says:
I have to say I had never heard of her (but I did look her up on google and I see she's English..)
She IS attractive.
posted 3 days ago